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Yoga and the Mind

What does yoga have to do with the mind? With our behavior and thoughts and feelings? Is it simply exercise or more? This class explores the heritage of yoga and the power of its psychology as embedded in the Yoga Sutras. Read More

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Follow the link to find links for downloads or our books for sale at Amazon.com  Read More

Managing Emotions, by Judith Sugg, Ph.D.

I was coaching a person with stage fright, an almost phobic response to the idea of being in front of people on stage. Kerry had done everything correctly –
preparing his materials, practicing, knowing his content, and doing his best to understand his audience. This calmed him and made him much more likely to succeed.

And he did pretty well. The only problem was that he was truly miserable before the presentation (fear, negative self-talk, sweating) and during the first part
of the presentation. It overshadowed his success on the platform.

What did we do? He learned to manage his state. There are numerous words and terms for this – self-regulation, state management, and self-management. They have
slightly different perspectives, but the elements are largely the same:

  • Being aware of self-talk and having the intention to change it if it isn’t working: A lot of us are aware of our self-talk, we may even have an
    idea of how to change, but don’t really belief it is possible. It is. And there are some powerful tools to make your self-talk effective.
  • Being able to regulate fear, anger, irritation, and frustration to get to an emotional response that is more neutral and helpful. This involves practice,
    and mindfulness techniques, as well as mental strategies, are very helpful here. Remember that emotion is a body response – so regulating an emotion also involves the body.
  • Holding in mind your values and adhering to them. This is alignment and authenticity! And it is hard when an emotion floods you. So how do you do this?
    By physically shifting (or breathing), recalling your intention or value, holding it in attention, breathing. That sequence gives you a chance to regain your stance.
  • Over time, it is useful to review successes (some of us focus on failures), take notice of what works and doesn’t work, take note of how others are
    successfully navigating difficult issues, be curious, and be open to learning.
  • Lastly, be honest – really honest. You’re more than your moment on stage. I told Kerry he wasn’t being totally honest when he negated his abilities,
    his honesty with clients, his trustworthiness, his ability to see others’ positive intentions, his analytical ability, and his achievements to date. He’s more than an episode of fear.
  • At the same time, Kerry incorporated a feedback loop so he could improve his presentations.   He told me that it had never occurred to him that
    emotions come and go, and that he could start to manage them.

He can.

Mindfulness in our words

Mindfulness in Our Words

Right speech is one of the Buddhist practices that help release human suffering. Intuitively, most of us can describe what doesn’t qualify as right speech: gossip, lies, attacks, defensiveness, egotistical ramblings, judgments, prejudicial comments, and the comparisons that foster jealousy. When we judge and compare, by nature we make someone right (ourselves) and someone wrong (them). We try to make ourselves bigger and the other smaller. Much of this is fostered by a psychological need to feel esteem and dignity, to defend our worth, to solve our problems; yet our words say something else, more convoluted and often hurtful to the other.

The opposite of all this evolves from right thought. It is intentional speech: Honest, kind, full of good will, reasonable, and congruent with our honorable intention. In psychology, we associate these terms with healthy, congruent, and authentic individuals – not perfect, but alive and aware and growing.

But what about the gray areas? What about speech that seems to just happen? That seems clear when we say it, but is misinterpreted? Or speech that seems reasonable in one light, but perhaps not in another? How about speech that keeps us “stuck”? Or conversations that harm relationships unintentionally?

Approaches to fostering right speech include the foundations of awareness, breath, and intention.   Almost any practice that slows our automatic responses – our reactions – and gives us time to sort our intention, our tone, our words, our attitude, and our priorities, will bring us closer to mindful and right speech.   When we are present, our words assist those who are reacting and on automatic.

Traditional practices of mindfulness (yoga, meditation, tai chi, prayer, etc.) are joined modern practices and teachings that fit with the concepts of right speech. They are especially helpful in those “gray” areas, when good intentions go astray.

Non-violent communication (NVC) is about language that helps individuals and groups express their needs and values clearly. Its intent is to foster compassion, partially by avoiding the assumptions most of us make so readily, and by increasing the inquiry and conversation that leads to deeper understanding. The goal is not to be nice; the goal is to be real within the understanding or circle of respect and dignity for others.

The core process of NVC is clear observation, awareness of feelings (which requires some insight into our own defensiveness), knowledge of our values or needs at a deep level, and clear requests for our partners. It also involves the intent to listen equally well to others, open the space for their needs to be met, a dissolving of assumptions about the other, and honesty.

Marshall Rosenberg formulated much of NVC, and his work is steeped in the humanistic tradition. His work has close ties to Carl Rogers, the father of modern counseling and founder of person-centered therapy. Rogers deeply believed in the sense of each person’s understanding of life based on their own experience – and healing was based in deep listening, regard and respect.

For me personally, the most powerful experience I have had of intentional words is through Connirae Andrea’s process of Core Transformation. Although essentially an internal process, its effect on communications and interactions with others is immediate. Her essential technique is one of unraveling our motivations to the point of a “core state” – usually something we experience non-verbally: love, oneness, connection, aliveness, wholeness. Her premise is that any thought, habit, emotional response, action, or compulsion is just part of the thread that, when followed exquisitely, leads back to the core. When I use the wording of her process in conversation, and the effect is almost always a deepening of understanding and a letting go of that which is not essential.

A third modern support is Clean Language and its variations. Clean Language is the understanding that we operate in description or metaphor, usually unconsciously. Yet the metaphors reveal the frame around our awareness. Clean Language was developed from working with traumatic memories. It respects the inherent power of how we internalize experience.

The metaphor of the experience evolves into the experience and can program the future.  If I get so angry that “I see red”, telling me to calm down does violence to me in some sense. But engaging me in gentle and curious questioning about “red” helps me move or shift or unstick the “red”. I am living “red” which I have labeled as anger – not really the other way around.   When we respect other’s experiences at this deep symbolic level, we automatically loose the assumptions and judgments that separate us. We engage in creative and vibrant and real communication.

This is a sampling of the many attempts to both live in the world with honesty, and promote peace and deep respect. Perhaps what is most important is where we started: The intention. The intention coupled with a curiosity and paying attention to what works and what doesn’t, can guide us in our speech with others and ourselves. The occasion of right speech, I think, is filled with glowing stillness.

–Judith Sugg, Ph.D., December 17, 2015

 

 

Mindfulness in Our Words

Right speech is one of the Buddhist practices leading to cessation of suffering. It is a virtue. It is easier, perhaps, to tell what is not right speech – when we gossip, lie, attack, create divisions, or speak egotistically to assert our point of view. In psychological terms, we label, we “should” on others, we avoid responsibility, we defend ourselves, we blame, we judge and compare, and we make someone right (ourselves) and someone wrong (them).

And so the opposite, evolving from right thought, is intentional speech: Honest, kind, full of good will, pure, reasonable, and congruent with an honorable intention. But what about the gray? What about speech that happens? How about speech seems clear at the time we say it, but later is revealed as less than kind. Or speech that seems reasonable in one light, but perhaps not in another? How about speech that keeps us “stuck” or harms a relationship unintentionally.

In this short essay, I look at a few of the techniques or processes that support the intention of right speech. The foundation is awareness, breath, and intention. Almost any practice that slows our automatic responses – our reactions – and gives us time to sort our intention, our tone, our words, our attitude, and our priorities brings us closer to mindful and right speech. Assuming that our intentions are peaceful for ourselves and others, our presence and words can assist those who are in reaction in the moment.

Although mindfulness practices – yoga, meditation, tai chi, prayer, and many others are foundational; there are modern practices and teachings that fit with the concepts of right speech. Non-violent communication (NVC) is about language that helps individuals and groups express their needs and values clearly. Its intent is to foster compassion, partially by avoiding the assumptions most of us make so readily, and by increasing the inquiry and conversation that leads to deeper understanding. The goal is not to be nice; the goal is to be real within the understanding or circle of respect and dignity for others.

The core process of NVC is clear observation, awareness of feelings (which requires some insight into our own defensiveness), knowledge of our values or needs at a deep level, and clear requests for our partners. It also involves the intent to listen equally well to others, open the space for their needs to be met, a dissolving of assumptions about the other, and honesty. Marshall Rosenberg formulated much of NVC, and his work is steeped in the humanistic tradition. His work has close ties to Carl Rogers, the father of modern counseling and founder of person-centered therapy. Rogers deeply believed in the sense of each person’s understanding of life based on their own experience – and healing was based in deep listening, regard and respect.

The most powerful experience I have had of intention words is through Connirae Andrea’s process of Core Transformation. Although essentially an internal process, its effect on communications and interactions with others is immediate. Her technique is one of unraveling our motivations to the point of a “core state” – usually something we experience non-verbally: love, oneness, connection, aliveness, wholeness. Her premise is that any thought, habit, emotional response, action, or compulsion is just part of the thread that, when followed exquisitely, leads back to the core. I use the wording of her process in conversation, and the effect is almost always a deepening of understanding and a letting go of that which is not essential.

Lastly, I include Clean Language and its variations because I think the understanding that we operate in description or metaphor is a revealing aspect of awareness. Clean Language was developed from working with traumatic memories. It respects the inherent power of how we internalize experience. The metaphor of the experience becomes the experience in some sense. If I get so angry that “I see red”, telling me to calm down does violence in some sense. But engaging me in gentle and curious questioning about “red” helps me move or shift or unstick the “red”. I am living “red” which I have labeled as anger – not really the other way around. When we respect other’s experiences at this deep symbolic level, we automatically loose the assumptions and judgments that separate us. We engage in creative and vibrant and real communication.

This is a sampling of the many attempts to both live in the world with honesty, and promote peace and deep respect. Perhaps what is most important is where we started: The intention. The intention coupled with a curiosity and paying attention to what works and what doesn’t, can guide us in our speech with others and ourselves. The occasion of right speech, I think, is filled with glowing stillness.

Early Bird Discount for Pure Potential Retreat!

Does your current life reflect all that you truly desire? What would you need to change for you to have the life that you want?

Pure Potential Retreats are 3 day retreats for women who are looking to unplug from the busyness of life and re-engage with our true selves and true desires by learning how to link the mind, body and spirit. With intention, honesty, safety and connection, we invite you to create “me” time along with developing community with others. Join us in Scottsdale, Arizona on November 13th and 14th to learn to decompress and experience renewal in a circle of warmth and friendship, compassion and guidance, kindness and caring.

Register before November 1st to receive the Early Bird Discount!

Print

 

Here’s what past participants have to say about Pure Potential Retreats:

“I loved, loved, loved it, and most importantly, have already employed some of the strategies and shifts into my life. You have given me the gift of self-awareness investigation and it has provided me with the ability to be brave enough to be myself. And that’s wonderful.”

“I got to know myself better, I’ve learned that I have much support in this world both with women and spirit. The food was great. The space was perfect. The schedule was well planned and times seemed to move quickly. There is plenty of room to spread out and a large enough space for us to be together.”

“I felt supported and valued, enjoyed the variety of events, food, casualness, timing and good energy.”

Your hosts for Pure Potential retreats are:

Judy Sugg- www.JudySugg.com

Renee Siegel- www.ReneeSiegel.com

Pure Potential Retreats- www.purepotentialretreats.com

Click here to register for Pure Potential Retreats: http://www.purepotentialretreats.com/event-registration/

I hope that you will join us for this profound event!

Feedback from The Wholeness Process

The Wholeness Process was amazing this year. Thank you to all who attended. Here is some feedback from the participants this year:
“I use mindfulness principles and practices and body awareness a lot, and this immediately deepened and expanded what I am doing personally and professionally.” 
Joan Williamson, LPC, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“My reactions/ego have gotten me stuck in my healing. This is a new and different way for me to work with them.  A totally new perspective that I appreciate.  I look forward to putting this into daily practice to see what shifts.  I really appreciate the patience of meeting me where I am at.”  
Christy, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“I learned to trust myself to a greater extent, to tap into my inituitive nature more — which is something I have found doubt in the past. Fast moving, but would always come around.  Brilliant insights — thank you.”
Karin, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“These techniques are very powerful for my awareness, peace and calm.” 
Patricia, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“What was useful was the process of precisely following the structure of what is, and how to merge or integrate it with awareness  — Workshop of the 3 days was excellent.  I am very grateful to have had this experience and I would strongly urge others to attend.”
Marie, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“Thank you for giving me a way to access the different parts of myself that allow integration to happen at essential levels.” 
Susan Liesemer, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“I hope to become more resourceful in moving forward with current life projects, sleeping better, perhaps even health improvements.” 
Sonja, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“Detaching from the story works!  Love the last exercise.”
Cindy Binkele, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
“Looking forward to practicing this with myself, friends, and family and eventually with clients.  Will probably have more to say as this settles in.” 
Lisa Anderson, September Participant at Connirae Wholeness Process workshop
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Early Bird Registration Ending!

The Wholeness Process with Connirae Andreas isn’t only for those who are interested in NLP, spirituality or personal growth; it is for anyone who has ever asked the question, “Who would I be without my problems?” This incredible event is coming up in just 2 weeks! The early bird discount expires this Sunday, September 13th and spots are filing up fast! I would love to have you join us for this one-of-a-kind event. Here are some powerful testimonies from those who have attended The Wholeness Process:

“The wellbeing that comes through this process isn’t dependent upon success, or having the right relationship, et cetera. And yet when we are living from this kind of authentic wellbeing, life does tend to go better. We can more naturally make a valued contribution in the world, and we more easily attract people we want to be around, (and enjoy those we might not have enjoyed previously).”

“I was amazed the first time I tried it and noticed bad feelings melt away, leaving me with peace and wondering ‘Where did it go?’ I have a new and easy tool I can use to neutralize cravings and addictions. … I highly recommend this training for people who are searching for inner peace and love.” — Jeff Denison

“Excellent. A profound experience which has been far more useful and effective for me than any past ‘mindfulness’ experiences. Thank you for this course! Benefits: Better quality of sleep. Deeper relaxation. Increase in general well-being. Most Useful: I particularly like the group guided process as have found the audio prompts within that video, and the tone, pace and language from Connirae most useful and helpful, in order to follow the process by myself.”
— Jason Fletcher, Wholeness Process Online Training Participant

I sincerely hope you can join us!

If you would like to register to attend this event, please click on this link:
http://www.judysugg.com/connirae-andreas-registration/

If you would like more information about this event, you can visit Connirae’s website at:
http://andreasnlptrainings.com/wholeness/

You can also visit the Facebook event page at:
https://www.facebook.com/events/910874378972234/

CONNIRAE PRINT5editable

Is This the New Mindfulness?

Connirae Andreas, developer of Core Transformation, is bringing her ​new, powerful ​workshop, The Wholeness Process, to Portland September 26-27. The early bird discount is extended until Sunday, September 13th, and places are filling up fast. Register soon!

For information and to register go to: http://www.judysugg.com/connirae-andreas-registration/

What is included in the workshop?

Day 1:

  • Background and frames to understand The Wholeness Process
  • Group guided experience
  • How it helps resolve emotional difficulties
  • Practice with detailed notes (2 times)
  • Demonstration of process with meditation and dealing with stress
  • Resolving sleep difficulties
  • How this applies to working with clients
  • Discussion and Q&​A

Day 2:

  • Resolving other types of inner separation using The Wholeness Process Principles
  • Reclaiming Inner Authority method: Helpful in resolving need to please others, shame, embarrassment, etc. (Demonstration and practice)
  • Integrating what’s missing
  • Resolving grief and experiencing the full joy of life.
  • Discussion, closing, Q&A
  • Closing group guided experience of the method.

​Day 3:

  • Deepen your practice
  • Use The Wholeness Process with Clients
  • Train and teach The Wholeness Process

 

If you would like more information about this event, you can visit Connirae’s website at:
http://andreasnlptrainings.com/wholeness/

You can also visit the Facebook event page at:
https://www.facebook.com/events/910874378972234/

If you would like to register to attend this event, please click on this link:
http://www.judysugg.com/connirae-andreas-registration/

 

CONNIRAE PRINT5editable

 

Here’s what people are saying about The Wholeness Process:

“This work is precise and specific — it is what mindfulness programs seek to do, yet it does it with more power, simplicity, and elegance.  And it is learnable and teachable!”
– HR professional and participant

“I think I appreciated Connierae’s authenticity and compassion more than anything else.  Her approach to teaching encouraged me and others to ask the probing questions that enabled finding the answers we were seeking.”
-Jeanne, participant

“The Wholeness Process created a huge breakthrough in my life. A breakthrough beyond my wildest expectations. I could not believe that it’s possible to have such a big change with a process that is so simple and easy, and yet so extremely profound. Connirae is a true master when it comes to change. She combines her unbelievable skilled NLP Mastery with an understanding beyond words about the deepest realms of your soul.”
-Martin Weiss, Coach, Germany

I hope you can make it!

What is the Wholeness Process?

What is the Wholeness Process? (as written by Connirae Andreas)

The process we’ll be learning comes from modeling an otherwise esoteric spiritual teaching (on what is enlightenment and how to get there) into a precise and doable method. This is a new process, and one that has been very useful to me personally. It works in the same direction as Core Transformation, but is simpler. Using this process naturally brings about greater integration and wholeness, when used repeatedly as a personal practice.

While your life will not be magically perfect after you do this process one time, there are many dependable benefits you will most likely experience. These include…

  • a deep relaxation and resetting of the nervous system
  • a natural melting away of many issues that before seemed like problems
  • increased sense of wellbeing
  • greater ease in relating to others
  • greater access to a natural wisdom and creativity

“You will learn a method which systematically changes the structure of our personality in a simple and impactful way.”

In addition to the general results, there are specific benefits that usually come from this method. One is that people suffering from insomnia usually find this process makes a huge difference. My husband was very surprised when it cured his pre-migraine aura instantly. I use it with couples as a simple and very effective way to transform emotional “hot buttons.” This makes the remaining issues much easier to deal with. You’ll be guided in discovering many specific benefits unique to your life. As with Core Transformation, this process is something you can apply to almost anything.

Here’s what people are saying about the Wholeness Process:

“The Wholeness Process is an effective, simple, and direct method for spiritual awakening, as well as for your own personal development or therapy. From my personal experience, I am delighted to recommend this program. If I can follow it and get a lot from it, then I suspect you will too.”
— Shelle Rose Charvet, NLP Trainer, author of Words That Change Minds, Canada.

“This simple process definitely works for me. While I’m doing it, no spiritual fireworks, « just » a deep, healing peace. Over time, for now : not an « egolessness », but a very gradual loss of attachment to « ego ». And that’s much more than I had hoped for when starting this program… With … deep gratitude,”
—Maarten Aalberse, Clinical Psychologist, France

CONNIRAE-WEB-HI

 

If you would like more information about this event, you can visit Connirae’s website at:
http://andreasnlptrainings.com/wholeness/

You can also visit the Facebook event page at:
https://www.facebook.com/events/910874378972234/

If you would like to register to attend this event, please click on this link:
http://www.judysugg.com/connirae-andreas-registration/
I sincerely hope that you can make it!